
What Perimenopause Taught Me About Being a Woman in My Own Skin
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I used to imagine perimenopause as something that arrived one day with a dramatic flourish, like a hormonal thunderstorm. Instead, it seeped in quietly.
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Category
perimenopause
Date
23/11/2025
Length
4 min read
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A forgotten word here, a night of restless sleep there. A strange buzzing beneath my skin, as if someone had dimmed and brightened the lights in the same breath.
At first, I blamed everything except the obvious: stress, weather, the moon, my pillow, maybe even the cat. Perimenopause was something older women talked about, not something that had anything to do with me. Surely I was too young, too busy, too still figuring it out to be perimenopausal.
But bodies are honest where minds are not.
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When the Shift Begins
It started with my cycles moving like ocean tides. Predictable, until they were not. One month early, two days long, the next heavy and defiant. My emotions mirrored the waves. On some days I felt like a wiser version of myself, grounded and clear. On others, I cried at a commercial featuring a golden retriever. There was a softness and rawness that did not feel like weakness but something deeper, like my body was calling me back to myself.
Perimenopause, I have learned, is not an ending. It is a recalibration.
A transition that asks.
What do you no longer want to carry.
What do you want to make room for.
The world tells us menopause is decline, but the women I admire, women who exhale confidence, know it is a beginning. A stripping away. A reclamation.
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The Quiet Conversations We Need
Perimenopause is one of those life phases that still lives in whispers. We talk openly about puberty, pregnancy, birth. But this Somehow it is considered unglamorous, inconvenient, or worse, taboo.
I now realize how much we need stories from women in this stage of life. Not medical pamphlets alone, though those matter too, but human stories. Real voices saying.
You are not losing your mind
You are allowed to rest
You are not alone
This is normal
There is beauty here too
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What Helped Me And Might Help You
Books
The Perimenopause Solution by Darcey Steinke a raw, insightful, beautifully honest read Hormone
Repair Manual by Lara Briden practical and science based support for real symptoms
The Wisdom of Menopause by Dr Christiane Northrup a compassionate look at this transition as a psychological and spiritual shift
Podcasts
The Dr Louise Newson Podcast approachable and evidence based support for hormones and wellbeing
The Midlife Feast with Dr Jenn Salib Huber gentle validating conversations about food body changes and midlife health
On Being in Midlife reflective discussions about identity purpose and womanhood after forty
Instagram accounts
Menopause doctor Dr Louise Newson clear empowering medical information
@michelleogundehin thoughtful writing on wellbeing design and the emotional terrain of midlife
@themidlifeedit style stories and encouragement for navigating change a ginger life raw humorous and refreshingly honest content about hormones and aging
Reclaiming Myself Slowly
What surprised me most about perimenopause is not the symptoms but the way it reshaped my relationship with myself. I am learning to listen more closely. To nourish instead of push. To honor rest without guilt. To trust that shifting does not mean breaking.
There is clarity too, a sharpness about what deserves my energy and what no longer does. I feel myself stepping into a version of womanhood that is less about pleasing and more about presence. Less about keeping up and more about coming home.
Perimenopause is not a storm to weather. It is a doorway.
And on the other side, I am discovering a woman I am beginning to truly like.
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